Comments for Jaspalin’s Fast Read Diner http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org Jaspalin's Fast Read Diner is all about getting 5 star quality reading! Wed, 18 Mar 2009 03:36:54 -0400 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.2 hourly 1 Comment on Don’t Judge A Rollercoaster by Its Cover(DRAFT2) by steven http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/10/15/dont-judge-a-rollercoaster-by-its-coverdraft2/comment-page-1/#comment-11 steven Wed, 18 Mar 2009 03:36:54 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=16#comment-11 jaspalllllllll pahalllllllllll your a total beast your storie was good 2 Ill c u in pe bro peace out pimpin fo life dawg lol STEVEN jaspalllllllll pahalllllllllll

your a total beast your storie was good 2

Ill c u in pe bro

peace out pimpin fo life dawg lol STEVEN

]]> Comment on The Note by Emily http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/09/20/the-note/comment-page-1/#comment-10 Emily Thu, 12 Feb 2009 22:42:41 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=14#comment-10 this is a great story. im sorry about your loss of your friend eliza. how sad. :(. this is a great story. im sorry about your loss of your friend eliza. how sad. :( .

]]> Comment on The Note by andrebms http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/09/20/the-note/comment-page-1/#comment-9 andrebms Fri, 19 Dec 2008 06:08:18 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=14#comment-9 Continued. I thought that it was sad that you had to leave your best friend. I think that it is sad the only thing you have to remember them by is just a note. It was a well written story and I would like to hear more of your past. Continued.
I thought that it was sad that you had to leave your best friend. I think that it is sad the only thing you have to remember them by is just a note. It was a well written story and I would like to hear more of your past.

]]> Comment on Forgotten Path by steven http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/10/02/forgotten-path/comment-page-1/#comment-8 steven Thu, 18 Dec 2008 23:29:47 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=15#comment-8 wasap jaspal pahal ! that rolar coastar is crazy scary lookin. c u in PE wasap jaspal pahal ! that rolar coastar is crazy scary lookin. c u in PE

]]> Comment on The Note by andrebms http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/09/20/the-note/comment-page-1/#comment-7 andrebms Thu, 18 Dec 2008 22:49:06 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=14#comment-7 Jaspaul,I thought that was interesting. I felt the emmotions maybe even some you weren't feeling. It was sad and funny, it made me want to cry. Jaspaul,I thought that was interesting. I felt the emmotions maybe even some you weren’t feeling. It was sad and funny, it made me want to cry.

]]> Comment on Don’t Judge A Rollercoaster by Its Cover(DRAFT2) by Anonymous http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/10/15/dont-judge-a-rollercoaster-by-its-coverdraft2/comment-page-1/#comment-6 Anonymous Thu, 20 Nov 2008 22:43:38 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=16#comment-6 hey Jaspal I liked your story. It was filled with great adjectives like how you described the feeling of going downward on the roller coaster. hey Jaspal I liked your story. It was filled with great adjectives like how you described the feeling of going downward on the roller coaster.

]]> Comment on The Note by Daniel http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/09/20/the-note/comment-page-1/#comment-5 Daniel Thu, 25 Sep 2008 21:30:26 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=14#comment-5 Mr. Reed is right, it does make it seem like a romance cliffhanger. I'm sorry I gotta say the truth. It is a good story, but i would recommend adding in metaphors and allusions to what the note said. Mr. Reed is right, it does make it seem like a romance cliffhanger. I’m sorry I gotta say the truth.
It is a good story, but i would recommend adding in metaphors and allusions to what the note said.

]]> Comment on Don’t Judge a Rollercoaster by Its Cover! by Daniel http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/09/20/dont-judge-a-rollercoaster-by-its-cover/comment-page-1/#comment-4 Daniel Thu, 25 Sep 2008 21:24:05 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=8#comment-4 Good story. I would recommend fixing the grammar mistakes, add a few more details, and maybe lengthen it a bit, like what you were doing when you entered the park and before you rode the coaster. Good story. I would recommend fixing the grammar mistakes, add a few more details, and maybe lengthen it a bit, like what you were doing when you entered the park and before you rode the coaster.

]]> Comment on The Note by Mr. Reed http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/2008/09/20/the-note/comment-page-1/#comment-3 Mr. Reed Thu, 25 Sep 2008 18:03:44 +0000 http://jaspalbms.edublogs.org/?p=14#comment-3 How sad! Eliza's note. I like how you focus on that note. However ...after that entire pieces, I have no idea who Eliza is or what she looks like. More details will help your readers experience that day, who you were with... the North Hills setting? Or did she hand you the note at Discovery Kingdom? Be sure to break this into paragraphs! How sad! Eliza’s note. I like how you focus on that note. However …after that entire pieces, I have no idea who Eliza is or what she looks like. More details will help your readers experience that day, who you were with… the North Hills setting? Or did she hand you the note at Discovery Kingdom? Be sure to break this into paragraphs!

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